The Bride's Boon

Translator's Postscript

Both spouses should put into their consideration when marrying the following intentions: freeing themselves of unfulfilled sexual desires, and protecting themselves from falling into that which Allah has forbidden (i.e. adultery and fornication). What's more, a reward as the reward for sadaqa (voluntary giving of charity) is recorded for them every time they have sex. This is based on the following hadith of the Prophet narrated by Abu Dharr:

 

"Some of the companions of the Prophet said to him: 'O Messenger of Allah, the affluent among us have taken the rewards (of the hereafter)! They pray as we pray, fast as we fast, and then they give charity from the surplus of their wealth!" The Prophet said: "Did Allah not make for you that from which you can give sadaqa? Verily for every time you say Subhannallah (Exalted is Allah) there is a sadaqa, and for every time you say Allahuakbar (Allah is Most Great) there is a sadaqa, and for every time you say Al-Hamdulillah (Praise is to Allah) there is sadaqa, and in every act of enjoining what is right there is sadaqa, and in every act of forbidding what is wrong there is a sadaqa, and in your sexual relations there is a sadaqa.” The Companions said: "O Messenger of Allah, is there a reward for one of us when he satisfies his sexual desire?" The Prophet said: "Don't you see, if he had satisfied it with the forbidden, would there not have been a sin upon him?" They said: "Why, yes! He said: "In the same way, when he satisfies it with that which is lawful, there is for him in that a reward."

[Muslim and Ahamd]

 

For Both Partners:

 

Be proud of your religion and the religion of your ancestors. Be a good example for your sons and daughters and sincere in your belonging to this mighty nation. Know that honor is an honor to all wise people, and that adultery is dishonorable to all nations, even if some called it freedom. Know that adultery is also done with the eyes by seeing, with the ears by listening, and with the mouth by kissing, as was mentioned in a Hadith related by Imam Muslim. Your happiness is in being obedient and believing people, loyal and generous partners and pious and merciful parents.

 

For a Muslim Wife:

 

Beware of the loyalists of Satan who want to lead you astray. Be a slave of Allah, righteous and descendent of righteous women and know your role in building this great nation. Perform your duty and do not be a cause for destruction. Be a maker of righteous generation that will lead mankind, again, to what is right and proper, to the great religion of Islam.

Those women who are showing parts of their bodies to men, will not enter Paradise or smell its fragrance and are cursed, as in the Hadith related by Imam Muslim. Hijab is an honor and protection for you. Hijab must be modest in color and not exotic, wide and thick and not revealing, different from the dress of non-Muslim women and men.

 

For a Muslim Husband:

 

Treat your wife kindly. Do not be harsh, tough and despotic. Do not force your will and decisions upon your wife in every matter without consulting with her. Take into consideration her feelings, exchange views on the matter and be pleasant with this wife. Do not consider your wife like some kind of chattel [instead of another human] and therefore deal with her with coldness and coarseness without any compassion or gentleness. In his comprehensive speech in the Farewell pilgrimage, the Prophet (pbuh) laid down the bases of behavior among people. He even commended spouses to treat each other kindly. Muslim relates,

 

"The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) then set out and the Quraysh did not doubt that he would halt at al­ Mash'ar al-Haram (the sacred site) as the Quraysh used to do in the pre-Islamic period. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh), however, passed on until he came to Arafat and he found that the tent had been pitched for him at Namirah. There he got down till the sun had passed the meridian; he commanded that al-Qaswa should be brought and saddled for him. Then he came to the bottom of the valley, and addressed the people saying: Verily your blood, your property is as sacred and inviolable as the sacredness of this day of yours, in this month of yours, in this town of yours, Behold! Everything pertaining to the Days of Ignorance is under my feet completely abolished. Abolished are also the blood-­revenges of the Days of Ignorance. The first claim of ours on blood-revenge which I abolish is that of the son of Rabi'ah ibn al-Harith, who was nursed among the tribe of Sa' d and killed by Hudhayl. And the usury of she pre-Islamic period is abolished, and the first of our usury I abolished is that of Abbas ibn Abdul-Muttalib, for it is all abolished. Fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have right over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their right upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner. I have left among you the Book of Allah, and if you hold fast to it, you would never go astray. And you would be asked about me (on the Day of Resurrection), (now tell me) what would you say? They (the audience) said: We will bear witness that you have conveyed (the message), discharged (the ministry of Prophethood) and given wise (sincere) counsel. He (the narrator) said: He (the Holy Prophet) 'then raised his forefinger towards the sky and pointing it at the people (said): "O Allah, be Witness. O Allah be witness,” saying it thrice.”

[Reported by Muslim]