Riyad Us-Saliheen (Gardens of the Righteous)

Chapter 280
Prohibition of Breaking ties and Relationships

Allah, the Exalted, says:

"The believers are nothing else than brothers (in Islamic religion). So make reconciliation between your brothers.'' (49:10)

"But do not help one another in sin and transgression.'' (5:2)

 

1591. Anas bin Malik (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "Do not desert (stop talking to) one another, do not nurse hatred towards one another, do not be jealous of one another, and become as fellow brothers and slaves of Allah. It is not lawful for a Muslim to stop talking to his brother (Muslim) for more than three days.''
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

Commentary:  "Hijran'' means to terminate contacts and speech. All the things mentioned in this Hadith are prohibited for the reason that they go against the spirit of Muslim brotherhood. Muslims are ordained to maintain the bond of Islamic fraternity.

 

1592. Abu Ayyub Al-Ansari (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "It is not lawful for a Muslim to desert (stop talking to) his brother beyond three nights, the one turning one way and the other turning to the other way when they meet, the better of the two is one who is the first to greet the other.''
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Commentary:
1. Since Islam is a religion based on the nature of man, it has a suitable concession in all his natural affairs. When there occurs a dispute between two Muslims then unpleasantness and contraction of mind are bound to result from it. In such a situation they naturally do not like to speak or maintain contact with each other. Islamic Shari`ah has acknowledged the validity of this reaction and granted permission to the party to suspend speech for three days. Since longevity of suspension of contact leads to severe hatred and animosity which increases dissension in society, creates obstruction in family relations and injures the bond of friendship, Muslims have been ordered not to let this temporary unpleasantness and turbidity go beyond a period of three days.

2. By highlighting the merit of Salam (salutation), this Hadith has prescribed an easy way for resuming the relations because Salam increases mutual love and paves the way for conversation and reconciliation.

 

1593. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "People's deeds are presented before Allah on Mondays and Thursdays, and then every slave (of Allah) is granted forgiveness (of minor sins) if he does not associate anything with Allah in worship. But the person in whose heart there is rancour against his brother, will not be pardoned. With regard to them, it is said twice: `Hold these two until they are reconciled'.''
[Muslim].

Commentary:  To entertain enmity without any major lawful reason is akin to inviting the displeasure of Allah. May Allah save us from it.

 

1594. Jabir (May Allah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) as saying, "The Satan has despaired of being worshipped by those who engage in prayer in the Arabian Peninsula but (has not lost hope) in creating dissension among them.''
[Muslim].

Commentary:  
1. This Hadith is one of the proofs of Prophethood of Muhammad (PBUH). His prophecy has come true that Muslims will fight among themselves and, as a result of mutual conflicts, sever links with one another; and this situation will arise as a result of the mischief, provocation and evil suggestions made by Satan.

2. One of the benefits of Salat is to maintain and strengthen the feeling of brotherhood and fraternity between Muslims..

 

1595. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "It is not lawful for a Muslim to forsake his (Muslim) brother beyond three days; and whosoever does so for more than three days, and then dies, will certainly enter the Hell.''
[Abu Dawud].

Commentary: Such a Muslim who persistently forsakes his Muslim brother for more than three days (i.e., he does not greet him and talk to him) and dies in this state, will certainly be punished in Hell along with other Muslims who violate such Divine injunctions. After suffering the punishment in Hell, he will be sent to Jannah because it is only the Kuffar (infidels) who would remain in Hell for ever. It does not, however, mean that a Muslim is at liberty to do what he wishes and he will not be sent to Hell even temporarily for punishment. Such an impression is a gross misunderstanding. This applies to women as well.

 

1596. Abu Khirash Hadrad bin Abu Hadrad Al-Aslami (May Allah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Prophet (PBUH) saying, "Whosoever forsakes his brother for a year is like one who sheds his blood.''
[Abu Dawud].

Commentary:  This Hadith strongly condemns those Muslims who forsake their brothers and sisters in Faith. Since those who are forsaken, have to suffer mental torture, this act has been regarded equivalent in gravity to killing.

 

1597. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "It is not permissible for a believer to forsake his (Muslim) brother for more than three days. If three days have passed, he should meet him and greet him; and if other responds to it they will both share the reward; but if he does not respond, he will bear his sin and the one who (has taken the initiative to) greet (the other) will be absolved of the sin of forsaking (one's brother in Faith).''
[Abu Dawud].

Commentary:
1. Contact and speech with people should be for the Pleasure of Allah only. For instance, if somebody is a heretic in religion, or commits sins openly, and in spite of the advice given to him, he does not mend his way, a Muslim can renounce contact with him for the sake of Allah. Such renunciation is permissible. In fact, it is desirable so that he may learn a lesson from it and may change himself. But severing contacts merely for worldly grievances is not permissible.

2. After three days, one who should take the initiative in giving Salam is more superior than the other. If the second party does not respond and perpetuates malice and enmity, he will be sinful and the former will be absolved of the sin of rupturing contact.